Principles

It has always been said a true test of one's principles is when nobody else is watching. Related, it is also a true test when they are maintained under duress.

It has occurred to me that someone I know in real life who I never intended to read this blog may have. I never really hid my tracks and I guess that I never really cared to. I will operate under the assumption that person is reading or may do so in the future.

This blog is all my inner demons laid out on the screen. Me in my rawest form.
It is an incomplete picture. It isn't the best thing for somebody to possibly judge me by.

That said, I wouldn't change a word (well except most posts could use a couple of rewrites to bring it up to 8th grade reading level). I also refuse to change what I write. Things will fall where they may and really I have no control over that.


Only right to document the result of the event hinted at below: Today was good but not great. It was not great mainly because of my own inaction. I will need to rectify that. I plan on it.

Stand

So tomorrow is the day. If it goes as it should, I will have to face what I have had to face for most of my adult life. Everything has a natural state. Mine is solitary. I can picture it as any other way.

But if it goes well, well then I have to face the fact of what I am going to put her through. I can't say that it will be worth it for her. She deserves better.

My instinct is to run and do her the favor. But I am pretty sure this is my last stand. If it works, I will just have to do my best to make it worth her pain.

Your feet are going to be on the ground
Your head is there to move you around
If wishes were trees the trees would be falling
Listen to reason
Season is calling

heh

Figured this was a good response to the post below.

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/funny-pictures-squirrel-girlfriend1.jpg

Flower for Algernon

I don't deserve her. I doubt there is much debate about that. But for some reason unbeknownst to me, there is a glimmer of hope. Life is becoming normal. The only question is am I Charlie or Algernon?



and yes a new post. How novel.

bitch bitch bitch

Why is it when everything seems to be going great on the surface, it feels like everything is going to crap?

It has been a while

It's been a while Since I've gone and fucked things up just like i always do.

I really need to give up on this hope shit

Moods

I am in a bitter mood for the normal reasons.

I am in a hopeful mood for the good reasons.

I am in a strange mood for the nonexistent reasons.

It is times like this that make me wonder if I am maniac or just plain crazy.

For the love of...

http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2007/04/21/wmd_conspiracy/index.html

But all of that is rendered moderate, restrained, sober and even sane by a new article she wrote for the British magazine, The Spectator (headline: I Found Saddam's WMD Bunkers), which claims that: (a) WMDs really were found in Iraq after the invasion, (b) they were located in vast underground bunkers (c) which contained "nuclear, chemical and biological materials", but (d) the U.S., through negligence, failed to secure those sites and, as a result, (e) the WMDs were stolen by The Terrorists and/or Syrian agents, who now have them and are actively plotting (along with China, Russia and North Korea) to use them against the West, but --

(f) because the Bush administration is so embarrassed by their failure to prevent the theft of all these dastardly weapons, and because Democrats are embarrassed by this discovery because it proves that Saddam really did have WMDs all along, they have all jointly created a vast conspiracy where they conceal the discovery of WMDs in order to cover up for their negligence.

Let's assume all that is true. How the hell does anybody who believes this not demand Bush et al to be tried for treason instantly? How does this support the case for staying in Iraq? But as the piece details, the people who think it is true don't have this reaction. I can only shake my head.

1 year old!

http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/1.jpg
http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/2.jpg
http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/3.jpg
http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/4.jpg
http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/5.jpg
http://home.comcast.net/~rsiconolfi/baby/6.jpg

Religious Stupidity

It is crap like this that makes me want to disavow organized religion entirely. I think I am pretty solidly Cathnostic. I think, like most reasonably people even atheists, God wouldn't be such a bad thing to exist. Whether he does or not is another thing. But I mean really. People like Bill Donahue make me ashamed to admit I grew up catholic. I mean for the love of all that is holy does he think that Jesus was crucified in a three piece suit. Fucking Stupidity.

Too much, too far. But I guess that applies to lots of "old" ideas.