Tuesday, October 04, 2005


The persona known as sig is dead.

Today I realized how long it has been since I have smiled. Color no longer exists.

29 years of Complete and utter failure is enough. It is over. It is time for me to concentrate on what is important. My future nieces/nephews have a chance to be happy, a chance to do things. It is too late for me.

This blog is closed. Don't expect it to open up anytime soon.

I've given up, stop. I 've given up, stop.
I've given up, stop. On waiting any longer

Don't come around here no more
Don't come around here no more
Don't come around here no more
Don't come around here no more

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Not me

So I did something last night that is so not me. I went on a spurt of the moment "date". It was an interesting experience. So this is what I been missing for so long. Granted it was a very strange night but it did teach me a couple of things.

  • The world will not collapse if I just go off and do stuff.
  • Not expecting or judging is real nice.
  • I should be glad where I am right now.
  • I am a normal guy, more or less, and women will react to me as such.
That lst one is real important. I definitely don't believe it most of the time. No women will never hit on me but that doesnt mean nobody finds me attractive. after all, I have to be somebody's fetish.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

The die is cast

Actually, it was cast last night. I have to sack up and not sweat these things. Now the waiting starts. And as Tom Petty said: the waaaaiiitting is the hardest part

BTW, this is my 100th post. weird.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

The fork was the final straw

This is a personal post. I need to write some things down. Read it if you want but it really isn't of interest to anyone.

I have been real stressed for some reason. My sleep patterns are off and I have no desire to do things (yet I am doing more lately than I have in the last few months).

I think it is work. Maybe. It hasn't been going well lately but really it isn't that bad and I care a lot less than I use to. It never really got to me before. So I don't know. This is the first year I won't have excelled. I have become that jaded guy we all looked at when we were new. 7 years. I am tired of the bullshit. I think life would be a lot better if a lawyer was honest just once. One time.

My personal life has been for shit (like normal). I am still a fucking wuss. And should just do it and get it over with. I am scared though. I guess I feel this is sort of a last chance. That final threshold. It isn't (I hope) but it sure as hell feels that way. I think that may be with the age thing. At this point, I'm half dead. What do I offer? She is 24. She can find someone else her age to go do things. I am suppose to be past that point. And I sound like fucking HP. That is so wrong. Tomorrow, I do it tomorrow. I need a "do you want to be HP?" post-it on my monitor.

I'm sure someone examining my life would think I'm depressed. But I seen real depression and I don't act anything like that. Not even close. In a way, it is true. I have some things that seem like depression symptoms. But I have been this way as long as I can remember. It is how I am. What has happened lately (the new stuff) isn't though.

And to top it all off, a fork just attacked my foot.

I want a do over. I won't get one though.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Tax Inquiry Is Moving Past KPMG

Tax Inquiry Is Moving Past KPMG - New York Times: "Ever since the accounting firm KPMG reached a $456 million settlement of a federal investigation into abusive tax shelters nearly three weeks ago, the question has been who may be next."

Looks like I was wrong. Maybe. I will hold judgement until they actually do something else.

Sounds like we are all agreed then

Brad DeLong's Semi-Daily Journal: "Those who analyzed or forecast the U.S. domestic macroeconomy agreed that a steep decline in the value of the dollar sometime in the next five years was overwhelmingly likely... those who analyzed or forecast the international economy as a whole were typically terrified by the prospect of a steep (30% or more, perhaps much more) decline in the value of the dollar:"
And that is why I have much of my assets in foreign denominated securities. 30-40% change in the value of the dollar is too big a change not to take advantage of. If you like economics, read his whole post. It is quite good.

I think, personally, we will be somewhere in between the two extremes (how noncommittal of me). It seems certain the dollar will decline. I think it will be somewhat orderly but there will definitely be some dislocations. The domestic economists are counting too much on the Fed and perfect reactions. The international economists I don't have much of an issue with except the worst case rarely happens. There will be adjustment. It might be painful but total economic stagnation would require no adjustment.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I think I would go with Frosted Flakes myself...

"If you can’t control it, let it go. Go back to your cereal. We suggest the oats squares."

Wise man that Martin. Even if he got it from a book.

At least it is something or is it nothing?

Well, I have to agree with Billmon, there is a first time for everything. And I want to say at least it is something, some sign of remorse. I think many things of the man, but cruelty was never one of them. His initial detached reaction to the hurricane, to be honest, shocked me. His more proactive stance, however, strikes me as nothing but political gamemanship. It is often true that the american public is forgiving to a fault. If Nixon said "there has been a fuck up and we are putting the people away" early on, I doubt he would have resigned. I think Bush is trying to play that angle. Why? Because it is the lazy way. And the one thing that I have learned over the years is Bush is a lazy, lazy man. He comes off as stupid and unaware because of this. He just does not care about anything related to the job or what we associate with civic political service. He likes a tussle (campaigning), he likes his sports, he likes his vacation time. Other than that, I can honestly say I have no clue about the man. Clinton? Workaholic, smarter than most of us can hope to be, an information whore. Bush 41? A statesman/ambassador. Deeply involved in "the game". Reagan? Passionate about anti-communism and all else was merely towards that goal.

It has been long enough. I think we can safely assume my streak is intact. And I think I need to admit I am a wuss/scared. bleh

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Bitch bitch bitch

MSN Money - When you -- and the IRS -- flip a condo: "Now, from your $100,000 gain, you've only cleared $44,700. "

Why is it that when people have to complain about taxes, they don't use any reasonable numbers? This idiot assumes a 35% tax rate. That means he is assuming the subject is making $319,101 or more a year. How reasonable is this assumption? Not very even among his readers. People making that much a year generally won't bother reading a free column for financial advice.

And idiot you even point out how this can be avoided anyway. Hold on the property for a year! Oh what is that? You need to flip it quickly because the market could fall or a balloon payment is due? Well, that is why this is an investment, it involves risk. If you don't want to take risks, then go find some bank CDs, flipping isn't for you.

And to top it off he is complaining that if you buy and sell multiple properties the IRS will consider it a business. Well guess what? If you are buying and selling this often, you are in the trade. Why should you get favorable tax treatment because you consider it a side thing for you? What if do more business than someone who this is their main job? He mentions self employment taxes of 15.3%. That would drop down to about 2% (the medicare part of it) after you sold the first house. And you wouldn't get hit with it in the first place unless you sold more than one (probably significantily more than one). So the numbers he presents is the absolute worst case scenario when combined into 1 transaction. If this was the only source of income (which negates the bitching of self-employment in the first place), the flipper has to make 4 sales at least for it to come true. And all three other sales would have a far lesser hit than the one he shows.

Finally, no where in this column is their any perspective that he is talking about 35 grand for 2 weeks a work, producing nothing, building nothing, not adding any extra value to anything. The flipper is just a leech. It sucks up wealth from the economy while not producing anything. That is why too much speculation is very bad. It is unsustainable. You want to bitch about making only 17 grand a week, go right ahead. You want to bitch about paying the same taxes as if you had a salaried job making the same amount but you work for much less time, go right ahead. It doesn't make you anything more than an idiot.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Word Verification

Sorry to anybody who wants to comment. I turned on word verification because of the spam incidents. I am doing this before it gets bad. It is another step. Not a huge deal but it will at least prevent autospammers.

Emails and streaks

So I replied to the shoe girl tonight. We will see if I break my streak. She is damn cute. She obviously has a pretty good sense of... I will say silliness. Humor is yet to be decided. But she seems to take my humor readily. Hell she replied to an email that started:

Nice Shoes, wanna....

So I probably she give her more credit for a full humor rating. Of course, considering the ad she might have just been braced for the worst.

This does tell me if it sputters and dies, that I need to take the plunge. Martin is right. Damn him.

For Kari

Suicidal music!

The Heroin Song - Dink
As I sit in my room at nite
With my curtains drawn closed and my door shut tight

I got my needles and I got my spoon
And I'm gonna lay it out on a picture of you
When the needle goes in my vain
I feel the power and glory and a little pain
I used to have a friend a lot like you
But now all I have is doom and gloom

When I look at you I go insane
The things that you do and the things that you say

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

In the garage- Weezer

In the garage, I feel safe.
No one cares about my ways.
In the garage where I belong.
No one hears me sing this song.
In the garage.

I've got an electric guitar.
I play my stupid songs.
I write these stupid words
And I love every one
Waiting there for me.
Yes I do, I do.

Monday, September 05, 2005

New Orleans on National Review Online

Editors on New Orleans on National Review Online: "No single step would go further to dramatize the GOP's commitment to rebuilding New Orleans than announcing now that the party's 2008 convention will be held in the recovering city."

Jesus Fucking Christ. Your party sat on its ass and did nothing for days and you think they will be ever so grateful to host your party right now? You guys are the obnoxious drunk guy trying to get into one more party before the night is over. Nobody wants you so you might as well go home.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

New Orleans

A city I never been to. And as I type this, it might be too late. It looks like the city will be evacuated for a month. There are estimates as high as tens of thousands dead. It is a frightening dose of life. I can't even begin to imagine how long it would take to rebuild. It might take a month just to drain the water.

And New Orleans might not be the hurricane's only victim. It might have been that lil bit extra need to push this economy over the edge.


I talked to Elena tonight (I really need to keep in touch with her more). I didn't know her sister was studying down there. Im glad to hear she is ok.

Love and Memories- O.A.R.

you're always lovely
i vision you were the one
now i'm stuck inside a memory
you forgot about a destiny
you buried me
didn't you
didn't you
love me faster than the devil
run me straight into the ground
drowning deep inside your water
drowning deep inside your sound

Sunday, August 28, 2005

KPMG Strikes Deal Over Tax Shelters

Washington Post:
"KPMG LLP will pay about $450 million and open up its operations to independent review as part of a deal with federal prosecutors to avoid a criminal indictment that could have sent the nation's fourth-largest accounting firm into a death spiral, according to sources familiar with the pact."
Im glad to see this. I would hope this would be the first of many but I know it won't be (article says as much). Corporations are going to push too far someday.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Right yet again...

Well looks like I was eerily prescient when I wrote this:


Talked to Pete today. Apparently, it is serious enough for marriage to be a topic of conversation.

Secondary note: Parents visiting for any length of time can be a real pain in the ass.

edit: no comments because of spam

Thursday, August 18, 2005


NoMarriage.com - honest marriage and relationship advice for men.

I wish it was a joke. I don't think it is.

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory: "Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held 'theory of gravity' is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling."

It is so absurd but yet I can totally see some fundy idiot doing it.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005


My fridge is on the fritz. The freezer is fine but the fridge is warmish. This so sucks. It is summer and my freezer is fairly full. If it was winter it would be easy.

Hopefully they will get me a new one but somehow I think they might try to fix it. I hate when shit happens at the worst time.

Sunday, August 14, 2005


Spent the weekend reading the DaVinci Code. It was decent. Needed an edit job I thought. At points, the writing became fairly weak. These nicely 3-D characters would all of a sudden become these 2-D rants against the church, opus dei, male oppression of women- take your pick. Good idea in general, pretty good plot and flow. But yeah the writing left something to be desired.

The weekend was boring but relaxing. Truly relaxing. I think I finally stopped caring about work in any other sense than a job. I definitely stopped caring. Too much stress, too much effort.

I decided I need to get off my butt and read the books that been waiting for me. It is a real shame I just sort of stopped. Same thing happened with working out. I also want to change that too.

Apparently, I am creepy again (if I ever stopped being). Not a huge surprise. Could be worse than creepy I guess. It is always an interesting juxtaposition of comments like say T/M's a couple of months (weeks?) back to other, often unexpressed, feelings about me. And compare them both to real life. Such a diversity of opinion and yet still the same old me. It is interesting the money thing came up again. I guess it is all part of fpf lore and it won't be change no matter the truth.

Always interesting to look at my sitemeter. Some hits I can ID right away. Some out there definitely are interesting and I have no clue who they could be. To my very bored readership, Hi! I would post more but I think that would only discourage you from doing something more exciting than reading this blog.

Saturday, August 13, 2005


But who is loving your mama? I AM! I AM!

I am so singing this to any future kids of mine.

QTime version better quality

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

What is your answer?

This Is Your Life

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you’ve broken
Don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes
This is your life and today is all you’ve got now
Yeah, and today is all you’ll ever have
Don’t close your eyes
Don’t close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

I don't know mine.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Cool Day

  • Had a lovely sushi dinner
  • Work went a lot better than I thought it would
  • Talked to a lovely Aussie girl named Kellie who lives across the street
  • Cell phone seems to be working again

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Testing and attention whoring

Let me test the blogger image thingamabob

My new knives that came today.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005


So he picked the white bread guy. Word is he is anti-abortion and fairly conservative but not an extremist like Scalia and Thomas. It is hard to say because he hasnt been a judge for long.

Some information(pdf).

Monday, July 18, 2005

The fall of capitalism

How Costco Became the Anti-Wal-Mart - New York Times: "Emme Kozloff, an analyst at Sanford C. Bernstein & Company, faulted Mr. Sinegal as being too generous to employees, noting that when analysts complained that Costco's workers were paying just 4 percent toward their health costs, he raised that percentage only to 8 percent, when the retail average is 25 percent.
'He has been too benevolent,' she said. 'He's right that a happy employee is a productive long-term employee, but he could force employees to pick up a little more of the burden. '
Costco's profit rose 22 percent last year, to $882 million, on sales of $47.1 billion. In the United States, its stores average $121 million in sales annually, far more than the $70 million for Sam's Clubs. And the average household income of Costco customers is $74,000 - with 31 percent earning over $100,000."

I am not a socialist. I like my stuff. No I LOVE my stuff. I want more stuff. I want enough money to never worry about it. But I don't want anybody to need for my wants. Greed will be the end of capitalism if the assholes aren't careful. We have a company that by all measures is sucessful but they don't make enough money for the assholes. Well, what the fuck is enough? Must it be a race to the bottom where Walmart is the ideal? Fuck that.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

And then there was one...

The number one thing about being single as you get older is all your friends are paired off. It isn't intentional for them to isolate you but a lot of things become couple things. It is just the way it is.

Add Pete to the list. Ok, fine I am being a little premature. Unless she is totally psycho, she will be around a while. She plotted to get him. What a fucking novel concept. Women actually interested and expressing that interest in a guy. I wonder what it is like.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Running in circles

Come up to meet you,
Tell you I'm sorry,
You don't know how lovely you are.

I had to find you,
Tell you I need you,
Tell you I set you apart.

Tell me your secrets,
And ask me your questions,
Oh, let's go back to the start.

Runnin' in circles,
Comin' up tails,
Its only science apart.

Nobody said it was easy,
It's such a shame for us to part.
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be this hard.
Oh, take me back to the start.

I was just guessing,
At numbers and figures,
Pulling the puzzles apart.

Questions of science,
Science and progress,
Do not speak as loud as my heart.

Tell me you love me,
Come back and haunt me,
Oh, when I rush to the start.

Runnin' in circles,
Chasin' tails,
Comin' back as we are.

Nobody said it was easy,
Oh, it's such a shame for us to part.
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be so hard.
I'm goin' back to the start.

Nice Guys

Nice Guys:
"One lesson that feminists crusading against sexual harrassment have successfully ingrained in some men -- and which I wish had been successfully ingrained in others -- is that it's very bad for men to express interest in women in ways that make them uncomfortable. This fits quite well with the other principles generally accepted by nice guys. But if nice guys are uncertain about what could make women uncomfortable, accepting this principle has the potential to paralyze them. They don't want to make women uncomfortable, and if they can't be sure that they won't do so by acting in a particular situation, they hold back and let opportunities pass them by. Or if they act, they do so with the lack of confidence that nice guys have when they're worried that they might be doing something wrong. This does not bode well for their chances of success. "

This is often how I feel. I am by most accounts a "nice" guy. Not 100% pushover but I feel bad if I am being selfish. It is definitely related to my problem with buying anything for myself. I can be shy (though not in the traditional sense). There is the whole physical shortcomings. But lack of initiative (I will explain why I am not saying confidence in a moment), I think is the number one problem for me.

It isn't confidence, or at least not largely so, because there are situations where I am totally confident. Give me a situation that is set up for me, and I can totally be your typical social bee. A new coworker who I have reason to talk to? No problem. Being introduced to a new member of the social group? Easy as pie. Throw me into a room full of attractive women who I have nothing obviously apparent in common and no real reason to be there (and thus no "in")? Crap. Napoleon enjoyed Waterloo more. It doesn't even have to be women though it is somewhat easier for me with men.

I can say honestly that feeling like I am imposing on someone crosses my mind in social settings a lot. I even feel that way with friends on occasion. Unfortunately, a fair amount of my social interaction reinforces that feeling. So much so that it has become as assumption that people are not interested in dealing with me. So I stopped trying. Every once in a while I stick my head back out of my hole. Usually, it ends up with me getting wacked really quickly and I go back in. Occasionally, the beat down comes after a little while. It is bad but its all I can do for now.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

London and the Flytrap

To me it has always been clear why I could never be a republican. I am a scientist by nature. I value data and facts above all else. If it doesn't work, then you figure out why it doesn't work. You don't keep doing it in hope that it starts to work. It always astounds me that people do this.

The latest example is that the London bombings provides "proof" that we need to keep the same direction in Iraq due to the Flypaper theory. Of course, this is absurd at best. The Flypaper theory, if it was correct, would prevent things like the London bombing. Hasn't anybody noticed that we have had bombings every year since 9/11 (e.g. Bali,Madrid)? It is time to start to pull out. The Iraqis have to stand on their own. We have to find Bin Laden.


Bubble or not? I have thought speculative to say the least for quite some time. Most likely bubble even. But assume I am totally wrong and this is totally based on fundamentals. I have heard the arguments that it is all based on the interest rates being so low.What then? Are all the gains safe?

The answer might be no.

Now, the first thing to note about this equation is that a small change in either the interest rate i or the growth rate g can have a big effect on the market fundamentals house prices, and stories that try to explain the surge in house prices in the frothiest communities solely in terms of market fundamentals rely on a combination of the two effects. However, the math works just the same going the other way. If we suddenly see a big move back up in mortgage rates, or if the communities where population growth has been outstripping the construction of new housing run into a slump, the same equations predict that house prices could go down just as impressively as they went up.
I think this is going to be bad. Real bad.

White Black Flag

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you,
Or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it
where's the sense in that?

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white black flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come back again
And I caused nothing but trouble
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "it's over"
then I'm sure that that makes sense

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white black flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet
Which I'm sure we will
All that was there
Will be there still
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue
And you will think
That I've moved on....

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white black flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white black flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white black flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I like it better this way

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

I feel so ghetto

I just repaired my keyboard tray with duct tape.

Monday, June 20, 2005

The Dirty Glass

Murphy, Murphy, darling dear
I long for you now night and day
Your pain was my pleasure, your sorrow my joy
I feel now I've lost you to health and good cheer
Darcy, when I met you I was five years too young
A boy beyond his age, or so I'd tell someone
Anyone who'd listen and a few who couldn't care
Still I welcomed you with open arms, my love I did share

Darcy, Darcy darling dear,
You left me dying, crying there
In whiskey, gin, and pints of beer
I fell for you my darling dear

You shut me off and you showed me the door
But you always came crawling back begging me for more
I showed you kindness, a stool, and a tab
Then you poured me my pain in a dirty glass
(Yeah, you left him bloody, battered, penniless, and poor)
You know, I often stopped and wondered how you made it through my door
With my brother's new non-duplicate registry ID
Well you bit off more than you could chew the first day you met me.

You weren't the first to court me mister you won't be the last
Oh, I'm sure I wasn't honey, I know all about your past
Listen to the big shot with his pager on call
You spent most of those nights in my bathroom stall
(Yeah, you got him high, but you left him low)
Mind your own business, boy, how was I to know
That he was just a fiend and a no-good cheat
Well it's all in the past bitch 'cause now I've got it beat.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005


I wish it would all just stop.

I need a vacation. I feel so stressed right now.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Another supply side/libertarian myth dies

They will always tell you the welfare state drags down economies. Safety Nets hurt the ones they are designed to help. We can not have Single Payer health care in this country as it would destroy us. We do better than everyone else because our regulations are lax.

Foreign Affairs - Mind the Gap - Robert C. Pozen: "Gross domestic product has grown at an average rate of 3.3 percent a year in the United States over the last decade, compared to 2.1 percent a year in the EU15. Per capita GDP growth, however, has been very similar: 1.8 percent a year in the United States, 1.7 percent in the EU15. The main factor driving higher U.S. economic growth is not greater productivity gains; it is a more rapidly expanding population."

We work significantily more hours and women are less likely to work outside the home in Europe. So with some changes, they should pass us. Europe's long term economic problems is not one of a welfare state dragging them down but of low birth rates and xenophobia.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Further musings on Class

I left off stating that the rich have a complete different worldview. I think the following shows this.
Ramesh Ponnuru on Tax Cuts on National Review Online: When surveys show that a fifth of the American public thinks it's in the top one percent of the income distribution, and another fifth thinks it's going to be there soon, conservatives generally applaud the public's confidence and optimism.

There are 2 findings there. One is an expectation that a person will do better than they currently are and I agree that can be applauded (though one may be worried about unrealistic expectations).

The second finding is the one that Ponnuru ignores and, to me, the more significant one. We have 20% of the country thinking they are in the top 1%. There is no other word for this than ignorance. This is not optimism. They don't believe something may be true about the future. They believe sometime that is demonstratively false is true currently. Why should this be applauded in any way, shape, or form? Simply put, if you can make people not understand the differences in class, then they will see one group's interests as their own even if it is completely opposite of their own. People think they are rich or nearly so when the truth is that they have no concept of what it is like to be rich.

The inequality of Capitalism largely exists on ignorance. Perfect knowledge automatically leads to transactions that are equitable. I think this is true in a free market as well as politics. People don't support policy like an estate tax because a lot of them believe it will affect them or will hurt the people it does affect. Of course, the problem with repealing the estate tax is it will affect those people in another way they do not know about (elimination of the stepped up cost basis).

My point is the rich seem to have a trait in common. They think they will always "win". And as I said before, a lot of them see themselves as better. So, to them, it is a good thing that the masses are ignorant. It just reinforces that belief because they are not ignorant. They are rich because they are not ignorant. They are not ignorant because they are better. They are better because they are rich.

I am not anti-rich though it may sound like it. I am anti-exploitation. And that is what I see.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Issues of Class

Pandagon: Class and marriage: "I cannot tell you how many times I had the jaw-dropping realization that friends of mine don't get that I have no safety net, nothing to cushion me that allows me to examine a creative career full-time. "
Maggie would love to have a summer internship with a human rights group, but she needs paid work and when she graduates, with more than $100,000 of debt, she will need a law firm job, not one with a nonprofit. So when Isaac one day teased her as being a sellout, she reminded him that it was a lot easier to live your ideals when you did not need to make money to pay for them.
I was born into a working/middle class family (hard to tell the line exactly). I have eaten government cheese. We were never on welfare. As we got older, it definitely got better. We lived closer to the edge when I was young than I probably even realize today. Even relatively recently, when by almost any measure we would be considered middle class, things were scary on occasion. My dad nearly died my senior year in high school. I was thisclose to not going to college at all. I would have went and got a job and that was that. There wouldn't have been a choice.

I went to college with a diverse group of people. There was the rich subset. And the richer subset. I obviously was in neither. And they had a couple different outlook on life than I could possible imagine. They had a lot of ideas about the way things were which I considered silly then and think is a sign of mental retardation now. Most had no clue what it meant to be limited by financial constraints. Many thought there were plainly better than other people. I will note not all. One of my best friends was extremely wealthy but you never knew it. So I won't say that class is deterministic but it is nearly so.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

When I used to go out, I would know everyone that I saw

You've got a nerve to be asking a favor
You've got a nerve to be calling my number
I know we've been through this before
Can't you hear me, I'm calling out your name?
Can't you see me, I'm pounding on your door?

Wednesday, May 11, 2005


There has been a debate recently in the blogsphere about Universal Health Care. Now, normally besides all the ideological bullshit you get a bunch of numbers proving this or that. However, there was an interesting twist in this debate. It got sidetracked into the concept of rights and whether Health Care is a right.

Well, as anybody who knows my thoughts on the subject, I think single payer would be a great idea but doubt it would happen anytime soon. My argument is almost always made based on economic grounds. But what about rights? Is it one? I think the short answer is yes.

McQ's issue seems to be that his right is being infringed because they are taking his money. Now, he comes from a fundamentally different perspective on the subject than me.

My view of government is that it is a system where there is a sacrifice of individual benefit for a common benefit. Or at the very least a disregard towards personal benefit. Capitalism is an example of this tradeoff. We don't care about each individual outcome as much as we care about the aggregate outcome. We, as a society, accept the possibility of impoverishment in exchange for greater growth overall and better potential for everyone. Now, we do use some of our wealth to mute some of the effect on the bottom but the fact is we do not take away Bill Gate's fortune to equalize everybody.

In this context, I view "Rights" as merely benefits of the system that pass a cost-benefit analysis (Yes, I know how cold and mathematical) . Does the proposed right cause a net positive or a net negative?

Now, some rights are considered innate. In my analysis, I would argue that these rights have such a large net positive benefit that without them, we remove ourselves from the sphere of civilization and humanity. In that sense, they are innate to being human.

But those rights are few and far between. What is innate about a right to own a gun? I would argue that it is not innate at all. It is a right that we as a society think is positive. But if society changed in such a way that it became a net negative, the right would be curtailed or eliminated entirely. This is what we see happening in urban areas. Urban areas are fundamentally different from rural areas and, as a result, limitations have been placed on gun ownership.

In the same context, I would argue that a single payer system is a right because it represents a net positive benefit to society. A large part of this is based on economic grounds. Namely, our system is inefficient because of its structure. I won't rehash the arguments made elsewhere at great length. Needless to say, anybody arguing that our system saves us money has a large hill to climb. But further, I would argue that a single payer system has additional benefits in terms of alleviating the uncertainity of the bad health lotto. People are more productive when there is less chaos around.

I think that is enough for now. I am sure I will elaborate more later.


Worked like a fiend today. I mean I needed to make up ground but it was almost silly how much I got done. Too bad I can't do it on command. Maybe it was the weather. It was so nice today. 85 and sunny. The only problem is I got home fairly late and bleh Im tired. I just don't feel like doing anything at all.

Monday, May 09, 2005

Just felt like posting this

I don't wanna hurt you
I don't wanna make you sway
Like I know I've done before
I will not do it anymore
I've always been a dreamer
I've had my head among
the clouds
Now that I'm coming down
Won't you be my solid ground?

Thursday, May 05, 2005


I been feeling older and older lately. I am also definitely looking older. It saddens me. And no, not because I am not young per se. I been feeling bad about getting older for quite some time. Mainly because I feel unaccomplished and inexperienced for my age. There is so much I haven't done. And the time is slipping away to do a lot of the things I should be doing. I wasn't too badly behind the curve at 22 but I basically stopped in my tracks since then. My life is a mess and I know it. But if I started to change it today (and was actually successful), what would I be by the time I am done? 35? 40? A 40 year old somewhere at the stage of a 25 yr old. That is depressing.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005


Oh and women, for the love of God, don't say you will accept "Any" on your personal profiles when we both know you don't.


Well that was an interesting debate in the fpf today about TFing someone. Some of the views were quite strong... "creepy" and "schmuckish" jump to mind. I get creepy. I dont get schmuckish. eh, People get too worked up over $5 it seems. I mean I wonder who sponsored me but meh I don't obsess about it.

D'oh! I accidentily winked at someone on Match.com. In a perfect world, I would have intentionally. She is cute and sounds real cool but.. yeah not a perfect world. Sorry girlie, I didn't mean to waste your time.

Oh well, a quick email that I been neglecting and then I must go to bed.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005


I hate how things never seem to go simply for me. I opened a new bank account (it had higher interest) and transferred money over (same bank). Well the money was taken out of one account. BUT it isn't in the other one! And of course I am feeling stressed about it. dammit.

Monday, May 02, 2005


I cut my hair tonight. I really need to just shave it. It gets more depressing everytime.

Sunday, May 01, 2005


"Stop searching forever, happiness is just next to you."

Considering I am surrounded by the back of a loveseat, a computer, and a table full of papers, this fortune doesn't look so hot. Or I have a really pathetic definition of happiness.


I need to get out of this cycle at work. It is going to kill me. I so need some motivation. I don't know where I am going to get some though. My life isnt going to provide any.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Sand in the hourglass

I totally been neglecting this. Its a shame. Time seems to go by without doing anything at all. I been feeling old for a while now. And I realize how old I been looking lately. I really need to shave my head. It isn't helping. Oh well another thing to add to the list.

I am thinking of getting a Corolla now. Its cheaper than the Civic and about the same as the Focus now. Being taking note of them on the street and they seem to be roomy inside and they are a good size (why oh why did I think I needed a large car?).

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Doings and happenings

I drove into the new office. Wasn't a bad drive. I hate the streets of Old Town though. They almost seem random in their orientation. The new place is growing on me though. I need to take pictures.

I know that starting over is not what life's all about.
But my thoughts were so loud, I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud, I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Faith fucking!

Oh yeah

As far as the Lord’s concerned, it’s Beaver Season all year ‘round.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005


Tonight is one of those bad nights. It will be better in the morning. I hope. I need a vacation though.

This amused me:

"Two former Cornell University entomologists who recently had the job of naming 65 new species of slime-mold beetles named three species that are new to science in the genus Agathidium for members of the U.S. administration. They are A. bushi Miller and Wheeler, A. cheneyi Miller and Wheeler and A. rumsfeldi Miller and Wheeler."

They claim its a honor. But slime-mold beetles? Somehow, I don't think the scientists are being entirely forthcoming.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005


Well, first day in the new office. It was... different. Very Disorienting. I will settle in time I'm sure. Found a place to get coffee (Yay!). Went walking around. But get this. We have really high ceilings (about ten feet) and for some reason the doors are nearly as high. I could have someone on my shoulders and walk through with no problems. It gets better though. The new office is ADA compliant. So the door knobs and light switches are much lower. So I have a 9.5 ft tall door with a door knob that a two year old can reach. Very weird.

Monday, April 11, 2005


Well I packed up all my shit today. Tomorrow is the first day at the new office. 7 years in one location and now its just... done. Weird. I wonder how Doug feels. 30 years in the same spot. It seemed strange going through all the papers from the last 7 yrs. So many things that were important at the time and now just garbage to be thrown out.

Weirdest most of all, horrors of all horrors, I have to actually commute to work. No more walking. Damn.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Things and stuff

The Net has been far too boring lately. I need entertainment dammit. Oh well.

The office move is here. Monday is my last day at the old place. I am kinda dreading the new place. Damn them and their rules.

I am looking forward to my move into a new apartment though (not moving the furniture itself though). Now I just need to find a place...

Monday, April 04, 2005

Still going

The running doesnt stop. My sister is doing ok. I move monday. The packing begins. I have a meeting with Bob tomorrow-ugh. I don't think I like where everything is heading.

stop my struggling, then I float to the surface,
fill my lungs with air, then let it out

I give it all, now there's a reason why I sing,
I give it all, and its these reasons that belong to me

Saturday, April 02, 2005


Days go by too fast, yet not fast enough. I just feel like I am running around all the time. Personal issues don't help matters. I should call my sister. Im glad that terri schiavo has finally passed on. I am sad that the pope has also. Today is such a wasted day.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Dark Thoughts

The flight home yesterday was rough. Not extremely rough but rough enough. And I sat there and thought if it went down that there was 500k in insurance on my life. Just thought how much money my parents would get. How my sister would be able to buy a house, and my future nephew/niece would get to go to college with no problem.

My thoughts are too dark sometimes.

Thursday, March 24, 2005


Gone til Tues. No updates until then.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Links edition.

Lots and Lots and Lots of stuff going on lately. We have congress passing unconstitutional laws and the public isnt buying it. But we are learning the beauty of a living will. We see hacks declaring fake qualifications for a doctor in this case. We have SS Trustees playing with the numbers to make things look worse than they are but even in doing that make the long term numbers look better. But the press can't get their story straight.

God I hope this shit comes to a halt and soon.

Saturday, March 19, 2005


Well, my sister called me this morning. Apparently, I am going to be an uncle.


I feel old now.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

They call them flippers

CNN/Money: "They call them flippers. Buy. Sell. Profit. Repeat. Investors are flipping houses to build wealth. Here's what you can learn."

They call him Flipper, Flipper, faster than lightning,
No-one you see, is smarter than he,
And we know Flipper, lives in a world full of wonder,
Buying homes over, how wrong they'll be!

If this isnt a bubble, I official give up and declare economics dead.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Hans Bethe

Hans Bethe died today.* I had the honor of hearing him speak about 11 and a half years ago. I remember almost not going to the lecture but I am glad I did. How often does one here a Nobel prize laureate talk to a small crowd? He was nearly 90 back then but you didn't know it. He still is one of the best speakers I have ever had the privilege of seeing. He was lively and warm, a trait you don't often see in the scientific types. The speech wasn't a hardcore scientific lecture but a history of things he had seen and people he met. A lot of knowledge passed out of our world today and the world is a little dimmer for it.

* login: badsiggy pass: badsiggy

Saturday, March 05, 2005


"The man of great wealth owes a peculiar obligation to the State, because he derives special advantages from the mere existence of government. Not only should he recognize this obligation in the way he leads his daily life and in the way he earns and spends his money, but it should also be recognized by the way in which he pays for the protection the State gives him. On the one hand, it is desirable that he should assume his full and proper share of the burden of taxation; on the other hand, it is quite as necessary that in this kind of taxation, where the men who vote the tax pay but little of it, there should be clear recognition of the danger of inaugurating any such system save in a spirit of entire justice and moderation. Whenever we, as a people, undertake to remodel our taxation system along the lines suggested, we must make it clear beyond peradventure that our aim is to distribute the burden of supporting the Government more equitably than at present; that we intend to treat rich man and poor man on a basis of absolute equality, and that we regard it as equally fatal to true democracy to do or permit injustice to the one as to do or permit injustice to the other."

Theodore Roosevelt December 3, 1906

I read that quote and the first bolded line is what jumps out at me. It is my personal belief. It has been long before I ever laid eyes upon this quote. The second bolded line is what I hear coming out from the other side of the chasm. The Rich are unduly burdened. Flat taxes are more "Fair". I understand their point but I don't think it applies to the current situation. I wonder how people can be considered burdened when their wealth grows faster and faster. My future grandkids might agree with the other side. That frightens me.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

And then there are bad days

Just blah today. Tired. Work sucks. Weekend will come soon thankfully. Nothing interesting to say today. Drive away by Gratitude is catchy but has stupid lyrics.

Some better ones:

She is everything to me, the unrequited dream,
the song that no one sings, the unattainable.
She's a myth that I have to believe in,
all I need to make it real is one more reason.

I don't know what to do,
I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad.

But I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me,
I won't let this build up inside of me

Good Day

Made a new Friend today. (If you are reading, Hi Alison!). She is obviously intellectual though a little hyper/unfocused - the joy of youth. Hell, we were even discussing human evolution for a while. I am going to enjoy talking to her. I hope she sticks around.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005


Greenspan-US economy sound, spending curbs needed - Mar. 2, 2005: "'However, tax increases of sufficient dimension to deal with our looming fiscal problems arguably pose significant risks to economic growth and the revenue base.

I hate it when people who know better act like nobody can tell they are lying. Asshole, current revenues are 16.3% of GDP. If we just rolled back the taxes cuts such that we were at 18%, which is still lower than we were at during some of the Reagan years AND lower than the level for most of Clinton's presidency, the Deficit would be roughly half and we wouldn't be having any major funding crisis. You remember the Clinton years right? Higher Tax Rates and yet we still had good growth.

'The exact magnitude of such risks is very difficult to estimate, but, in my judgment, they are sufficiently worrisome to warrant aiming, if at all possible, to close the fiscal gap primarily, if not wholly, from the outlay side,' he added."
And you know Alan, because you can do simple math, that if we cut every single cent of nondefense discretionary spending, we STILL have a deficit. Heritage knows this

President Bush’s 2005 budget request takes a first step by proposing freezes or near-freezes in most non-defense discretionary programs. However, these programs represent less than one-fifth of federal spending, and cannot provide sufficient savings to close a $500 billion deficit.

Goes to show you can NEVER trust a Randite.

Monday, February 28, 2005


Just came on the radio. Reminds me of bad sad times. I wish music would remind me of good times. Of course, its hard to think of specific good times. It is easy to remember specific bad times.

Winter's cold, spring erases
And the calm away by the storm is chasen
Everything good needs replacing
Look up, look down all around, hey satellite

Friday, February 25, 2005

Things that annoy the fuck out of me

  1. That everybody seems to be becoming adult without me
  2. House listings absolutely suck right now
  3. Being bored on a friday night
  4. Laundry
  5. Work (right now)

Wednesday, February 23, 2005


Oh heaven restores you in life
I spent a lifespan with no cellmate
The long way back
Saying meanwhile can't we look the other way?
You're weightless, semi-erotic
You need someone to take you there
Saying meanwhile can't we look the other way?
Why can't we just play the other game?
Why can't we just look the other way?

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Monday, February 21, 2005

10 Things and a couple more

1. I have met several people from the net.

2. I have had sleep paralysis and insomnia off and on for a long time

3. I am at work far too much but I don't actually work enough

4. I don't have nearly as much money as everybody seems to think.

5. I am amazed at how much I have accomplished in life considering how lazy I am.

6. I am afraid of growing up which is why I don't own a house, haven't bought a new car, and why I refuse to apply for management.

7. I been in love once.

8. I hate buying things for myself.

9. Physically, how I feel ranges from complete crap to marginally below par on a day to day basis.

10. I came thisclose to not going to college at all. Not of my own free will either.

11. I was complimented on my penis today

12. I worry that I will someday get Alzheimer's like several of my relatives

13. I feel old (see 6)

14. Hypocrisy is my one big bugaboo

15. I need to get laid.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Mystery Solved

Well I finally figured out why my blog got all that traffic a while back from random locations. When I posted that funny video of the guys doing the aerobics, it apparently got linked to a listing site for videos.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Observant People they be

Three people asked me if I was growing a beard today. I have seen all three of these people multiple times in the last couple of weeks. Apparently, it is a magic beard and was hiding all this time.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Vanity post

Well, trying to decide if the beard stays or goes. Cute Starbucks girl talked to me today. But that was a matter of time. All the people in there know me. So that isnt a beard bonus.

On one hand, I kind of like it. But Im not happy with the way the mustache part is coming in. It doesnt totally connect and the hair that is there is fairly light. So it looks like a huge gap.

I will probably end up shaving it. Not right now though.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Some days Good, Some days Bad

Well, I was told today that they think my grandmother had a heart attack. This isn't good. She is a worrier. It is definitely the stress. God knows she eats healthy and she is thin (maybe even too thin). Bleh, I wish my uncle would grow up.

I also decided that I need to get my sleep schedule in order. I won't have much choice when we move offices (April 11th!!). Damn management. System has been fine for years and years. But not anymore because "we" are screwing up. And I have a bridge to sell you in Brooklyn. Maybe the new schedule will motivate me to workout again. Its been forever and ever since I did that. I think back and can't begin to fathom how I lost 60 pounds.

Elena said she wouldn't date me if Vince died. And she doesn't fuck people she doesn't date. Bitch. You call yourself a friend.

Sunday, February 13, 2005


Fresh showered and shorn. I kept the beard for now though. Still not quite sure what to do with it.

I come to realize I hate cutting my own hair but its for the same reason I cut my hair. Going bald sucks and that makes it that much harder to cut it so it looks halfway decent.

Someday, I will go crazy. Then I will get the hair transplants, the laser eye surgery, and lose the 100 pounds. I think right now I would settle for the hair.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Social Security part 2

Brad Delong expands on the way to reconcile the numbers (see my post below) and adds three other ways.

  1. A substantial decline in the stock market in the near future to push dividend yields back up to the levels they need to be.
  2. Stagnant wages and a permanent jump in the profit share to push dividend yields up to the levels they need to be.
  3. A large jump in firm payouts, supported by the fact that accounting earnings are massively understated.
  4. A long-run trade surplus of 6% of GDP.
3 and 4 are just plain silly. 1 is scary and 2 sounds like so much fun!

Some people expressed confusion at all this stuff (Hey Moz!). Well quick version:

Right now, SS collects more money than it sends out. The extra is put into a Trust Fund(think a bank account). Republicans think the Trust Fund will run out of money in the future. It is possible. They are suggesting that we should change the system to one in which people invest their money in the stock market. It should make up the shortfall (or so they claim). The issue is whether it is possible for SS to fail AND the private accounts to suceed. That is what the statements above discuss. It is possible but so unlikely or scary as not to be something you want to plan for.


Today sucked. It was sort of neutral up until 4. Then my mom called telling me that my Grandma was being rushed to the hospital. That is all I knew for 2 hours. She apparently will be ok but they need to run tests to find out what happened. Those were a stressful 2 hours. Somedays it pays to stay in bed.

Thursday, February 10, 2005


I realize I been drifting for a long time now. I also realize that I am very lucky to have the life I have. I could literally travel anywhere I wanted next week. If I wanted a car, I could get it. Financial and temporal obligations are minimal. As Bridey said, I have a "ton of good stuff going for " me.

This life has allowed me to drift aimlessly for a long time now with no real consequences. The question is if I had a harder life would it actually be more productive, more useful. And yes it was a lie of omission when I didnt say my sig was how I often feel in response to Bridey. But one learns not to constantly bitch about how they feel if they don't want to cause undo harm.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Social Security

Well someone finally did it. Someone finally explained (to some degree) how private accounts could work and Social security fails. The scenario doesnt even seem plausible but at least it works on some mathematical level. Fewer taxes for corporations and stagnant wages for 75 years. Think MegaCorp Future. Yippee.

The interesting point is stagnant real wages would reduce future Social Security benefits. In effect, the wage index would equal CPI and therefore, it would have the effect of the cuts Bush has proposed. The question becomes is the net effect eliminating any solvency benefit the Bush cuts has and therefore, causing more problems (debt) down the road?

Someone still needs to ask why Bush is such an economic pessmist.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005


Well, I was all decided to shave my beard tonight. I don't think it is for me. But then another random chick decided to chat with me in the elevator. I know it means nothing but I use to be just in the background before. It is weird. I don't think I am doing anything different but they think I am more friendly (?) with a beard.

My ATM card works now. It is nice to be able to have cash again. They put a fraud hold because I bought gas. They considered it unusual behavior. Somewhere, Brad is snickering. Bastard.

And it seems that Thread has finally died.

Not a bad day. Still tired though.

Monday, February 07, 2005

My own personal hell

Ok the last couple of days have just had all sorts of sucky things going on.

  1. That thread is still going on. It is ridiculous. They are now arguing the equivalent of Hitler (yes I am fucking godwinning it) isnt so bad because Mussolini did some bad shit too.
  2. The Patriots won. Another year of listening to how I should Felliate Tom Brady every chance I get because he is so underrated.
  3. I just feel like crap. I think I am "not quite" sick. Wish my body would pick one or the other.
  4. My ATM card still doesnt work. Granted I did nothing today but they should have called me by now.
  5. I am turning the Kim shit into something in my head it should not be. It was random and not symbolic of anything dammit.
I still feel old and past my time though. That is what it is really about. Maybe this means I should just buy the damn house. So what if I fuck up. At least, it is something.

Sunday, February 06, 2005


Well I called today to find out why my ATM card would not work last night. It gave me a strange error "Card can not be used." Apparently there is a fraud hold on my account. They, however, didnt see fit to call me or notify me in anyway. So when I got somebody, the girl said she needed to transfer me to get it resolved. I get transfered and the phone actually rings. No hold just ringing. I let it ring for about 5 minutes. Looks like I will have to go to a branch and get this crap resolved.

Also, I noticed that my sitemeter exploded. Jesus, I have an audience now. Well welcome all. I know some of you I am sure (Hey Zabka!). Some are clearly random though. Anyway I hope it isnt a waste of your time.

Saturday, February 05, 2005

My first drunk post

went out tonight. Brad saved me from hooking up with kim. probably not a good idea but still i regret it. I cant blame him though. He really has no idea. Im too old for this shit. It felt nice to have someone next to me and not try to get away.

Better birthday present then i would have expected.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

My birthday

I was going to write this really long post about my life but i decided against it for now. If it behaves better, it might earn it.

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

For record keeping purposes part 2

A cute girl said hi to me today. 2 days in a row? Very Weird. Must be the scruffy beard, lack of hair and extra weight. It drives them wild.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005


Someone sponsored me for TotalFark. If you are reading this, thank you. That was way too nice of you.

For record keeping purposes

Girl in the elevator smiled at me today.

Monday, January 31, 2005

Humor in odd places

For all the fans of this oldie

EricPrydz - Call on Me

There is this new version. I think this one is for the ladies.


Sunday, January 30, 2005


As time passes, i become more and more jaded. It is weird in a way. I stop caring about what I write in emails. The more disgusted I am, the easier it gets.

The more I think about circumstances the more annoyed I get. I always get a reply if I dont include a picture. I never get a reply when I send one (even when emails have already been exchanged). Should I just include a picture in the beginning? or should I wait? False hope verses constant silence.

I want one day (one lousy day) for my birthday. Just one.

Learn something new...

Posted by Lepus:
Posted by sig:
Posted by Thales:
Posted by sig:
It's ok you are a cute girl. and a lesbian on top of that. You just have to talk to some loser and he would be willing to look up all sorts of things for you.

Hey wait a minute...

Speaking of which, how is your Amazon wish list coming along Lepus?

If I were a woman I'd totally be showing my tits on the internet to get sigguys to give me stuff.

Nah. She broke my heart. Only thing she is getting from me is coconuts.

Which I will break over your head and then steal your wallet.

Jeez. and you didnt even see the W2's yet. Im scared.

Never knew lesbians were so violent or greedy or both.

Saturday, January 29, 2005

makeup lesson

makeup lesson

I just watched a japanese girl glue her eyes open. That is quite disturbing.


Stereofunk-The Idiot Library :
"Posted by Inno:
Posted by sig:
Posted by Inno:
To both Sig and Preacher


Disappointing. Can I see your ass wiggle then?



So that means when we hook up at the SF get together, I have to keep the lights off?"

Never give up. heh

Friday, January 28, 2005


I feel sorry for poor Elena. I remember how much Autumn leaving ripped me to shreds.

I totally given up on figuring out love. It never makes any sense and it is just a waste of time. Of course, like an idiot I fall for the same shit every time. But that makes sense. After all, Im soon to be 29 and nobody has ever loved me.

In a week, I will change my mind. I always do.


Posted by Lepus:
Posted by sig:
Posted by Lepus:
Posted by sig:
Posted by Lepus:
Reason number two why we can't be together.

Really let's be honest. The lesbianism doomed it from the start.

Since sexuality is fluid, I can't say with any certainty that I could never fall in love with a man.

But I would have to see the W-2's first.

Ignoring the fact it would be inappropriate, I think I would find your reaction amusing.

I think my reaction would be, "Jesus Christ I can't believe he just sent me his W-2s!"

Heh, I was thinking something along those lines. Followed by, "Wait, is that scientific notation in Box 5?!?"

Ahh, you got to love good natured lesbians.

I be a hypocrite if it wasnt true

"Ok, just stop that. At a bare minimum, you are cute. In a lot of circles, you would be considered hot. You like a person who treats you like crap because somewhere in your head you think you can't do better. You aren't fat, You aren't ugly, You aren't missing any limbs. There isnt any reason to think people see you as anything but attractive and desirable. You can do a hell of a lot better. Demand respect because that is the minimum you deserve."
I just snapped at Inno. Why do people put themselves through crap for no reason? I'd kill for no reasons to be honest.

And it gets worse:

Fuck the not ready for a relationship stuff. He should NOT be degrading you in public at all, boyfriend, fuck buddy, or stranger in the street. He may have good intentions but he is performing bad actions. He is screwing with your head. The abuse will only get worse.

I have often wished for one day (one lousy day) but things like this make me think that even then it wouldn't work. I hope she gets help or helps herself. She has a chance.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Second Post

That is a lie. I know why I am here. I just doubt it will be productive.

First post

Why am I here? I don't know. Guess I will find out.